A comic with no plan

One comic. Zero continuity.
Whatever's funny wins.

New PG strips from two friends who can't stick to one idea. Beavers, monster trucks, drive-thru chaos, whatever's funny that week.

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The strips so far

Five up so far. The rest drop soon, one at a time.

A scientist in a lab coat waves his hand in front of a glowing purple portal in his time machine, telling his dog: I can't believe I invented a time machine!
The scientist pinky-promises his dog with a serious look: There's one thing I have to do.
The time machine whirrs, zaps, and vwooshes as its portal glows, sending the scientist back in time.
In colonial times, the scientist holds up a sub sandwich in front of a stunned Benjamin Franklin and shouts: And you call it a sub sandwich!
Full strip: a scientist invents a time machine for one single purpose, going back to yell at Benjamin Franklin about the name sub sandwich.

Time Travel

He built a time machine for one reason: to tell Ben Franklin exactly what he thinks of the name "sub sandwich."

A gruff bald driver with a goatee and skull patch pulls his truck up to a Burger King drive-thru. The speaker crackles: Welcome to Burger King.
Close on the driver's angry face as he yells: What?
The drive-thru worker, unbothered, says into his headset: Can I take your order?
The driver yells again, pointing furiously at the speaker: What?
Full strip: a tough guy at a Burger King drive-thru can't hear the crackly intercom and just keeps yelling what.

King vs. Stone Cold

He just wants a Whopper. The drive-thru speaker is not making this easy.

Title card: the International House of Pancakes Olympics, with a stack of pancakes as the medal.
A line cook sweats over the grill, sizzling row after row of bacon.
A waitress pours coffee into four mugs at once without spilling a drop.
The waitress hurdles over an IHOP-branded hurdle, balancing a towering stack of pancakes on a tray.
Full strip: breakfast service reimagined as an Olympic sport, bacon, coffee, and a pancake hurdle sprint.

The IHOP Olympics

Pouring coffee, flipping bacon, and hurdling pancakes to the table. Just a regular shift.

A guy at a bar asks a monster truck driver: You busy Saturday? Can I use your truck to move a fridge?
The monster truck driver chugs a drink. Gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp.
The driver grabs him and shouts: Hell yeah, brother!
An actual monster truck comes flying in. Yee haw!
Full strip: a guy just wants to borrow a truck to move a fridge, and the monster truck driver takes it way too literally.

Lifted Movers

He asked to borrow a truck for a fridge. He's getting a monster truck instead.

A beaver on the phone says: Hey, Daryl is having a party tonight, do you want to go?
The beaver replies: I don't know. He's different since he moved to the west side of the river.
The beaver, surprised: Really?
Daryl the beaver floats in the river wearing sunglasses, a backwards cap, and a gold chain that says Daryl.
Full strip: friends gossip about how Daryl has changed since moving to the west side of the river, ending on Daryl living his best life in a gold chain.

Daryl's Different Now

A beaver named Daryl moved to the west side of the river. Everyone has questions.

Coming soon
A bearded man in a blue polo points at a truck and asks a guy in a green shirt with crossed arms: What do you think that means?
Close on the truck's California license plate, which reads BRDTCHR.
A bird in front of a chalkboard teaches a row of little birds, under a sign reading Bird Teacher.
The bearded man grins, a bird perched on his finger, hearts floating around them, under a sign reading Bird Toucher.
Full strip: a license plate reading BRDTCHR can mean Bird Teacher or Bird Toucher, and one of them is a lot weirder.

BRDTCHR

Coming soon.

What is this, exactly

Scratch the Itch doesn't do continuity. One strip is beavers running something they shouldn't be running. The next is a monster truck driver having the worst Tuesday of his life. There's no cast, no ongoing story, just whoever's funniest that week. Same art style, no master plan.

It's a side project from two friends who wanted to make something dumb and put it out into the world. New strips go up when they're ready, not on a schedule we're going to pretend we'll keep.

Get the next one first

New strips post on Instagram before anywhere else. This site is the full archive.

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